The Self Sabotaging behaviour (that's holding you back!)

ARE SOME HABITS AND MINDSETS HOLDING YOU BACK?

Some of these are so common in the hair and beauty industry, can you resonate with any?

Most hair and beauty professionals don’t even realise the damage they cause.

Its time to stop these bad habits, patterns and mindsets from holding you back!

Stretching out appointments.

Whether employed, self employed or freelance this is particularly self sabotaging.

Prices should calculated based on business costs, stock used and worked out into time.

If the appointment should take 45 mins and stretched to 1 hour it could mean the difference of making a loss or even working below min wage.

If extra time is needed then you should confidently charge more!

Think about a visiting a bar or restaurant; a cocktail tends to be more expensive than other alcoholic drinks on the menu.

This isn’t necessarily because a cocktail is a bigger drink.

instead, it has more elements to it, which require more time to make and more skill from the bar staff.

You are therefore; charged more.

Discounting can be a lethal way of stopping you from earning the money which you are entitled to and also attract the wrong type of client into your chair.

The Golden Rule: Discount does not drive loyalty.

How many discounts do you offer? What would happen if you stopped some or all of these?

Yes; you might loose some discount led clients - but have the time and space to focus on full paying clients who actually make you money.

Not charging correctly.

This can be done in many forms, eg: not increasing your prices when your supplier costs or rent go up, undercutting your competitors prices (without considering your own costs and profit).

There is no need at all to absorb the cost when your supplier has an annual price increase, you rarely see other industries doing it, so why should the hair and beauty industry?

Before you know it you or the salon owner are spending all of the turnover on stock/rent/wages and there is little or nothing left in the pot afterwards.

Perfectionism.

In this case we are referring to the times when setting, often unachievable standards can lead to disappointment and can exacerbate an already anxious state into a downward spiral.

You believe that you can’t take action until the right time, or tell yourself that you need to perfect your skills before you move forward.

Perfection is an impossible standard that actually holds you back.

Procrastination.

It’s hard to shine when you don’t give yourself time to fix mistakes or do a thorough job.

This will appear in many forms such as:

“I’ll write my colour notes later”

“I will manage the post when I’ve got time….”

“I will phone my client back later on”

Or those times when you have been in between clients watching social media with no purpose or intent. If you can identify your distractions and remove or reduce them as well as taking jobs in bite size pieces you can really take baby steps which will lead to a big impact!

Negative self-talk/negative thinking.

When your inner dialogue is constantly critical.

Are you chastising yourself for past mistakes?

Are you constantly criticising yourself?

Believing that you cant do as good a job on a colour than a colleague?

Seeing work on social media and allowing yourself to feel inferior in knowledge or skills.

This is a serious form of self sabotage.

Be patient with yourself.

Be kind to yourself.

Work to build yourself up.

There is also a positive voice in there and its likely to be screaming to be heard!

Seeking Approval.

If you are focused on what others think of you, you aren’t listening to yourself.

Trying to gain approval from others will only hold you back.

There are times when it’s good to get the opinions of others, but you don’t need constant accolades from everyone around you.

approval from your clients? yes! Your boss, yes!

You are your own person, with your own successes and failures.

Focus on the people around you who matter. who care. who are a positive influence in your life.

Undefined goals

Many hair and beauty professionals have an idea, concept or dream which they want to turn into reality. A big holiday? A wedding? A new car? Maybe their own salon? Maybe travelling?

What ever the goal, without a firm plan and a clear vision, you are unlikely to achieve it.

Defining your goals is the first step toward making them happen.

Think of this as creating a map that will guide you to your destination. Without a map to steer you in the right direction, you can easily go off course without even knowing it.

Staying in your comfort zone.

Taking risks is a scary thought for most hair and beauty professionals.

After all, stepping outside your comfort zone means taking a leap of faith and inviting the possibility of failure. Nobody wants to fail.

But you will never know what you are truly capable of unless you try. The comfort zone is a wonderful place but nothing ever grows there! The comfort zone is holding you back.

Consider your professional industry idols, who have taken radical leaps out of their comfort zone. Maybe its Sophia Hilton? Adam Reed? Ben Brown?

All of them failed at one point, but none would have been successful if they hadn’t pushed themselves.

Remember, with risk comes the possibility of great reward.

Being consumed by failure.

Don’t let failure weigh you down. Instead, wear it like a badge of honour.

Has a client given negative feedback? Perhaps not happy with the finish? The colour wasn’t as expected? Yes its gutting when your craft and skill is criticised. But try to take the feedback as a gift. Having feedback, whether negative or positive will allow you to develop and maintain your skills and will all lead to a better version of you.

It’s an awful feeling, but you should recognise that you aren’t alone.

No hair or beauty professional succeeds without failing sometimes.

Assess what went wrong.

Learn the lessons you need to learn so you can move forward and make better decisions next time.

Here are a few top tips (HEIRLooms) to eliminate your self-sabotaging nature:

Organise: prioritising your “to do” list

Set realistic goals and expectations.

You don’t have to do it all on your own – delegate if needed.

Ask for help- when things start to become overwhelming talking it through can help.

Distractions goodbye: remove or reduce the things (or people)- your “go to” distractions.

Building up your self-esteem- “approval not wanted nor needed”

Training. Identify those services which cause you the most stress and anxiety and gain training in these areas to help you become confident as well as quicker.

Community. Make sure you surround yourself with positive influences who help and support you.

This can be virtually- online in a Facebook community for example.

Or perhaps distancing yourself from someone who is negative and brings your mood and self worth down.

Find your inner positive voice. Its there, and our guess is you will like what it has to say!

Fear is often at the root of what holds us back.

We fear that our inner critical voice is right.

We start to worry that we don’t deserve happiness, aren’t tough enough or simply don’t have it in us.

It’s time to put aside those harsh inner voices of "I can’t" or "I’m a failure."

That negative internal dialogue is a destructive self-limiting thought.

Start replacing that critical inner voice with positive, encouraging thoughts.

Make small, meaningful changes these will slowly build to create greater transformations in your life.